I love Halloween. What’s not to love? Of course I get to show off my adorable costumes. But, hello! Treats! So today I decided to recruit my canine sister, Linnie, to collaborate on our top 5 favorite cat and top 5 favorite dog treats for the upcoming holiday.
As most of you probably know by now, my mom is a veterinarian. In case you’re not sure what that means, it means that she gets paid to insert objects of torture (and sometimes even fingers) into skin, muscle, ears, or (ahem) any orifice belonging to animal victims all while smiling and holding polite conversation with their humans. And please, oh please, don’t ask me how I know the details of what happens at the clinic.
I don’t fully understand the motivation behind it all, but she has been in this career for quite a while. And, fair warning, she does seem sensitive as to the longevity of her practice. Just the other day when I asked if she got to work on Noah’s animals she gave me a very dirty look. So, anyway, I figured since she’s been doing this for a few centuries, she must have some interesting stories to tell by now. So I decided to do an exclusive interview about some of the things that happen behind the scenes. Although I tried to keep this professional, I think Mom’s interview skills need a little polishing up.
It’s easy to distinguish people who know cats versus people who think they know cats. First of all, people who say they don’t like cats, well, they simply must not know cats (or at least they must not know me). So often us sweet kitties are characterized by the ignorant folk as aloof, independent creatures who only care about ourselves. Sometimes people make comments like, “I had a cat I liked once. But that was only because he acted just like a dog. He followed me everywhere.”
Oh, my inner feline groans just to hear offensive comments like this. It’s just embarrassing for the humans who make comments like that. Please, oh please listen up while I clear up some of the misconceptions about feline love. I may even throw in a couple of thoughts on canine affection as well, just to avoid any accusations of media bias.
I did it. I’m just being honest here. Of course, you look at me and, rightfully so, you see a sweet little angel. It is almost impossible to imagine. And yet, it is true. I scratched my mom and made her bleed.
So, listen up, guys. People complain. I mean, a lot. And, to be honest, I’ve even done it myself before. Maybe. Once. Ever. But let’s talk about this for a minute. Because, after all is said and done, what do most of us really have to complain about, anyway?
Okay, so don’t worry. This isn’t going to be one of those “it could be worse” speeches or “think about how bad things are for the dump-off animals.” No, I really just want to be rational and positive here. Seriously, let’s take a moment and be grateful while we fold some clothes together.